I think I often don't know how others perceive me; more than once I've been surprised to find out. The first time I was about 14, and beginning a friendship with a girl who would become a best friend. She told me she'd always thought I was so stuck up, because I never talked with most people but clearly was confident and cool. I had thought the same about her! Turns out we were both fairly crippled by social anxiety and insecurity and our silence came not from confidence but a total lack of it. So, I guess she and I were both projecting our own stuff onto each other.
I’m normally fairly oblivious to what others think of me, I don’t pick up hints. I need to be bluntly told, which I was in this case. And for me I very often don’t see what they are seeing, as in this case. My best friend of 4 years at secondary school when she found out we were moving said, ‘I was only your friend because I didn’t want to be your enemy’. Little old shy never say boo to a goose me - worthy of being an enemy? What would I have done to her as an enemy. Stared at her from behind the school library door and refused to let her borrow the books? Wooo, scary!
I think I am the same (not picking up on hints). Always surprised when I find out someone finds me intimidating. Maybe should have tried to figure out how to capitalize on that somehow, but I've never been able to be strategic in that sort of way. I just am who I am, mostly.
I’ve been called intimidating too, I’m anything but. But I am blunt, and assertive for a female. I can be quite bulshy, cos I don’t take any shit any more. But also intrinsically shy and introverted. A whole mish mash really.
I think I often don't know how others perceive me; more than once I've been surprised to find out. The first time I was about 14, and beginning a friendship with a girl who would become a best friend. She told me she'd always thought I was so stuck up, because I never talked with most people but clearly was confident and cool. I had thought the same about her! Turns out we were both fairly crippled by social anxiety and insecurity and our silence came not from confidence but a total lack of it. So, I guess she and I were both projecting our own stuff onto each other.
I’m normally fairly oblivious to what others think of me, I don’t pick up hints. I need to be bluntly told, which I was in this case. And for me I very often don’t see what they are seeing, as in this case. My best friend of 4 years at secondary school when she found out we were moving said, ‘I was only your friend because I didn’t want to be your enemy’. Little old shy never say boo to a goose me - worthy of being an enemy? What would I have done to her as an enemy. Stared at her from behind the school library door and refused to let her borrow the books? Wooo, scary!
I think I am the same (not picking up on hints). Always surprised when I find out someone finds me intimidating. Maybe should have tried to figure out how to capitalize on that somehow, but I've never been able to be strategic in that sort of way. I just am who I am, mostly.
I’ve been called intimidating too, I’m anything but. But I am blunt, and assertive for a female. I can be quite bulshy, cos I don’t take any shit any more. But also intrinsically shy and introverted. A whole mish mash really.
I suppose we all are. A whole mish mash. 🙂
Just who you are sounds perfect. Stuff others. 😜
Interesting idea and worth bearing in mind.