Really liked that one, my darling. Not that sure why, but it just seemed more like what, in my entirely untutored and inexpert mind, 'proper poetry' should be. I totally don't get all this high-flutin' stuff with rules to be obeyed on the form and number of syllabubs etc, so a number of verses (albeit with no capital letters or full stops) worked better for me. Love you lots, Ralph. PS - love the black rose pic as well, which really set off the prose.
Love love love! I recently woke up at midnight having had an epiphany of how to cure/prevent all suicidality. I took notes then went back to sleep. Upon waking, the solution was nonsensical upon rereading. Absolutely devastating 😭
Tam, this is wonderful. I'm not sure where my head is when I'm writing, but I don't think much comes out of it when I'm feeling despondent. Sometimes, though, I find I can write myself into a different plane, if that makes sense. Not in a 'cheery-uppy' kind of way, but in a 'okay, I feel connected again now' one.
This line really resonates:
"I sleep with pen in hand drawing spirals
in my slumber"
In fact I've been collecting some of the notes I've written in the middle of the night - not on paper, but on my phone (shhhhhhhhhhh, I know that's terrible!) - they're almost entirely incomprehensible and therefore hilarious to me. I WISH it had occurred to me to keep them all, and that I hadn't got into the habit of deleting the nonsense next morning, because en masse they'd be excellent fodder to write about! Still, my collection is still growing, thanks to my night-time noting habit.
Thank you. I need to keep my eyes shut whilst I write otherwise I’ll be awake for hours, but deciphering what I scrawled is often a very hard puzzle. One night last week it was just spirals, I expect they had meaning at the time but I can’t for the life of it work out or remember what. I’ve spent many an hour not using my notebook and reassuring myself I WILL remember in the morning only to have forgotten it all 🤦🏼♀️ . Those night time notes are gold dust.
Oh gosh, I love love love that you keep your eyes shut when you make your nighttime notes, Tam - that’s awesome!
Recently I’ve added ‘waterproof shower notebook and pen’ to my birthday list - because these days I have all my best ideas in the shower - and get so cross that I’ve usually forgotten them before I’ve even got out of the bathroom!
Despondency is not conducive to writing for me. I think my words usually come from some kind of complex feeling I want to better understand. Like Didion, I often write to figure out what I think. (Or feel.) I love the idea of drawing spirals in your slumber, and the different kinds of yellow.
I seem to need some kind of negative feeling to get me started, and I also write to figure out what I think, my brain images are so weird as well, I think I just have a melancholic soul, not depressed though, just always looking on the dark side.
Really liked that one, my darling. Not that sure why, but it just seemed more like what, in my entirely untutored and inexpert mind, 'proper poetry' should be. I totally don't get all this high-flutin' stuff with rules to be obeyed on the form and number of syllabubs etc, so a number of verses (albeit with no capital letters or full stops) worked better for me. Love you lots, Ralph. PS - love the black rose pic as well, which really set off the prose.
I love
“I sleep with pen in hand drawing spirals
in my slumber”, and then the last full stanza and single last line are so beautiful.
Thank you ☺️
Love love love! I recently woke up at midnight having had an epiphany of how to cure/prevent all suicidality. I took notes then went back to sleep. Upon waking, the solution was nonsensical upon rereading. Absolutely devastating 😭
Oh that would have been a wonderful thing to do. Keep the notes though they may make something else.
Really like it, Tamsin. Of the poems of yours I’ve read, this is definitely one of my favourites!
Thank you Thomas, appreciate it.
Tam, this is wonderful. I'm not sure where my head is when I'm writing, but I don't think much comes out of it when I'm feeling despondent. Sometimes, though, I find I can write myself into a different plane, if that makes sense. Not in a 'cheery-uppy' kind of way, but in a 'okay, I feel connected again now' one.
This line really resonates:
"I sleep with pen in hand drawing spirals
in my slumber"
In fact I've been collecting some of the notes I've written in the middle of the night - not on paper, but on my phone (shhhhhhhhhhh, I know that's terrible!) - they're almost entirely incomprehensible and therefore hilarious to me. I WISH it had occurred to me to keep them all, and that I hadn't got into the habit of deleting the nonsense next morning, because en masse they'd be excellent fodder to write about! Still, my collection is still growing, thanks to my night-time noting habit.
Thank you. I need to keep my eyes shut whilst I write otherwise I’ll be awake for hours, but deciphering what I scrawled is often a very hard puzzle. One night last week it was just spirals, I expect they had meaning at the time but I can’t for the life of it work out or remember what. I’ve spent many an hour not using my notebook and reassuring myself I WILL remember in the morning only to have forgotten it all 🤦🏼♀️ . Those night time notes are gold dust.
Oh gosh, I love love love that you keep your eyes shut when you make your nighttime notes, Tam - that’s awesome!
Recently I’ve added ‘waterproof shower notebook and pen’ to my birthday list - because these days I have all my best ideas in the shower - and get so cross that I’ve usually forgotten them before I’ve even got out of the bathroom!
Despondency is not conducive to writing for me. I think my words usually come from some kind of complex feeling I want to better understand. Like Didion, I often write to figure out what I think. (Or feel.) I love the idea of drawing spirals in your slumber, and the different kinds of yellow.
I seem to need some kind of negative feeling to get me started, and I also write to figure out what I think, my brain images are so weird as well, I think I just have a melancholic soul, not depressed though, just always looking on the dark side.
I appreciate the distinction between melancholy and depression. I would probably say the same about myself.